It's Ajik's birthday. And like any of you who forgets - and this is actually quite normal - I DO have another brother other than Aying. The last one in the family called Ajik. Yes, I seldom talk about Ajik because I seldom see him. From the moment he entered primary school I have been in SMKAKS waaaaay in Kuala Selangor and only return to Shah Alam once a month and this goes on for five years. By the time he's entering teenage years, I've been residing in Matrics UIA, PJ at section..... (gile haru minah ni, Matrics UIA PJ pun leh lupe section berapa... 17? 18?). Then when I entered UIA main camp at Gombak, he started on his high school waaay in Sri Menanti, Negeri Sembilan. Then even when I started working and always at home, Ajik pun blah ke Matrikulasi Melaka.

All of us have this really bad perangai of not remembering much about his life. Haha. I mean, kaklong is older than Ajik by 10 years, me 7, Aying 5... and every time people start asking me "Ajik sambung belajar mana sekarang?" I'll be like, "Uh, somewhere in Melaka, I dunno, doing Chemistry or something."

And really, it's not our fault that he's different. We are all sports-morons and can't run 200metres to save our own life. But Ajik was the district's long distant runner. LONG DISTANT! The first time I saw his medal for that, I was like, "Are you adopted?" Of course he's not... he looks too much like my dad anyway. Ha.

Aying described Ajik perfectly. He said that Ajik is a three dude in one. Because when he's with his friends, he has this kind of persona like Noh from band HUJAN kind of vibe with his stapled-to-head hairdo... kinda indie-like...
Then when he's asked to lead the prayer, he'll be all pious and Taliban-like with his serban and jubah hitam and kain pelekat and reciting the prayer in that sekolah-pondok-ish way.
Then when he's studying, he's wearing a lab coat and holding test tube with chemicals inside.

It's like three diferent person altogether. But, I think it's four, cuz at home, to me he's just the pain-in-the-ass Ajik who always forgot to shut my laptop after using or forget to flush the toilet... or that one time where I had to cover his blunders after he drove recklessly, without bringing his ID nor lesen and hits a car... and I had to do my 'forgive-my-brother-for-he-has-sinned' act with the pakcik whose car is now dented.

One day Imma smack a bit of sense into the boy's head.

But still, he is my brother and he is now 19. Boy, time sure flew by rather quickly...

I woke up late today, although I have a press preview at 10.30 in GSC, Mid Valley. Alllll thanks to a stupid nightmare. And here's a thought, Indonesian horror filmmakers, if you want to make another horror movie, please hire Meriam Bellina as the ghost. Cuz yesterday, i had a nightmare about her. It was first a dream, that I was again wearing the PRESS tag for Cinema Online covering for a horror movie called "Mendam Beradu" (don't blame me for the stupid title. It's not me, it's the dream), and was approaching Meriam Bellina for an interview. But then I was whisked away alone into the cinema hall and then suddenly she turned into a pontianak. Damn scary. Terjaga and it was 5am. Tidor balik pukul 7.

Asked my dad to hantar sampai bus stop section 2, and he looked at me with no words, put down his SAMPOERNA ciggy on top of the wooden table outisde the house and fetch the keys. I was like, "Aren't you going to finish your ciggarette?" and he looked at me with that face that says, "I'll finish it later when I return."
Why do men always leave the ciggy like that and then do something else, then continue? It can trigger fire and burn the house down!

And then, while at the bus stop waiting for U80, I realised that indeed it is near CNY and it's the 'budak-UiTM-bus-hogging' day. The bus is filled with budak2 UiTM with big bags. To top it all off, the driver was in a cheerful mood, like there's the "Myyyyy What a Happy Daaaaay" song on top of his head as he drove around leisurely, while it's already 10am and we're still in friggin Asiajaya. And of course, he HAD to initiate a chat with every single person boarding the bus. Yeah, chat on, driver man, go slower. I am in no rush at all to go to a press preview.

On the way I saw students of SM Projek on a cross-country race. Ah~ innit funny calling it 'merentas desa' when there's no 'desa' to be crossing about... try Kuala Selangor. THAT is a merentas desa. Masuk kawasan kampung, across the bridge, singgah beli aiskrim, pretend that you're not in a race at all and then arrive last all the time... sweet sweet memory...

Saw Inayah in the cinema hall. Aparently she didn't know that I've resigned already. Maybe that's why for the two minutes I was talking about "Only two people left in editorial..." she kept talking about "You and Zee..." Me, being the blur finally realises this and go, "Oh no, I've resigned. Only Zee and Swee in editorial now. Me doin freelance now." (Inayah was one of the ed team too, long before I joined ed)

Balik tu I hopped on the bus and realised that it's pakcik baik who is drivin. Pakcik baik is one of the more familiar faces for all this time I've been using the public transport. I called him that just because he got that innocent face. But he drives like a maniac and from Bangsar to Kompleks PKNS it took him only twenty minutes. But he was not THAT baik when one old nyonya accidentally pressed the alarm button and the bus stopped. After realisin that the old nyonya is not getting off after 5 minutes of stopping he screamed 'Turunlah!!!'... I was like, chill down, old man. She didn't mean to. When you're old you TOO would make that same mistake. But then again, maybe when I am at his age I TOO would get pissed off. Hmmm... Ugh, that's it. Stop trying to understand people's feelings.

Singgah PKNS to meet up with Iza (and her friend Faten), who got stood up by her mak andam. While looking at me closely she finally understand my notion of 'I'm slimmer'. Though, she thinks that I'm as thin as her now, though that would be seriously in the wrong... I said I am 'slimmer', not 'thinner'. They're different. And then keep tellin me "No, don't eat. Keep on with the shape." Hahaha, seriously, Iza. I must eat. I am indeed just a human. Food keeps me going, you know. It's not exercise, it's just my unscheduled waking up-sleeping-eating thing. It's not really healthy to be doin that actually.   

Balik rumah, Iza tumpang sembahyang, then write my review (click CHANGELING HERE), hantar for proofing, kena lecture dengan Zee about horrendous grammar, then makan, and tido.

Anyway, I wanna create an entry about this boycotting thing that has been annoying me for ages now... but I guess I'll do that some other time.

nota kecil: *blogdrive buat perangai lagi
                 *change blog song to Chuck Berry's 'Never Can Tell'
                 *change flixter wallpaper to "10 TIHAY" but now I think I shud return to "TDK" again. The new wallpaper is too pink. I'm not pink. No where near pink.

Here's a thought.

Smokers who smoke like a chimney and cough like hyenas have no right to tell me when should I eat or not eat roti canai. So I ate roti canai at 11pm. Relax. Don't be such a nincampoop about it. Oh yeah, "...carbs at 11 are bad for your health."

Ugh, what are you? Gay? How about nicotines?

Between press preview and go see mak andam, I have decided to go press preview....... uuuuuuu, double meaning. Akakaka.

Iza and Zamel are getting engaged. That's what the initial planning of 'temankan-Iza-pegi-jumpa-mak-andam-tapi-kensel-sebab-Shai-ada-press-preview' were about. Congrats on that. I have seen that relationship, its ups and downs that sometimes involves me in the process. Ha. It's an event to be celebrated, at least as I think it should. It's one of those relationships that I felt near to (and sometimes stole for my novel, amen to that) and now it's turning into something better. And that reminds me...
Last time in the car I belched happily to Mun's retort:
"Kau langsung tak peduli pun akan kewujudan Yeh dekat belakang, kan, dengan sendawa bunyik macam tu."
"Alah, Yeh je pun..."

Yes. When it comes to being myself in front of men, let me tell you, I can be completely and utterly disgusting in front of people's husbands and boyfriends and fiances. I mean, come to think of it, belching in front of Yeh, packing Kenny Roger's muffin inside my bag like makcik-makcik jakun in front of Zamel, guffawing in front of Lan... in front of these guys I can so totally be myself. It's that psychology thing where I realise that I don't really care about being prim and proper cuz they're attached (or semi-attached) to my bestfriends and that made them like pseudo-family too and I can soooo be myself. At times even to the extent of forgetting about these guys' existence and start talking about lingeries.

Wouldn't it be cool if I am not all prim and proper in front of everybody? And I don't mean to strip loose and go all wacky like some moron. Just, be comfortable. Babble about politics when I want to, or curse when I feel like it, belch whenever I want, and tell that Indon guy in the LRT that if he doesn't stop staring at the pink-shirted lady's tits, Imma tat his eyes out. Wunnit be cool?

Swee calls me the 'Know-it-all SYH'. It seems that I knew the ongoings of the office more than her even though she IS there, while I'm... well, here. Every time she has that "You wanna know what happen today?" I always do the, "Person B is getting blablabla and Person C is gonna get blablabla?" and then spoil her fun of actually trying to surprise me. Okay, I swear, next time people wanna gossip, I will try not to hear it okay, so that you can have all your 'surprising Syahida' moment.

Here's another thought.

Imma talk about Civilianisation of War. Why? Because it's my bloody blog and I write whatever I want. And I felt like getting preachy today, so bear it!

I was watching "Independence Day" yesterday, you know, that stupid movie where Hollywood are not very subliminally telling people around the globe that whoever rains on their parade, be it men or alien, will be exterminated - and that the black people are gonna be the ones doing the dirty job while the jews will be the mastermind and white Americans are the ones saying hooray with absolutely no clue. And it reminds me of the wars of yesteryears, where battles ARE chess. Real chess - whose casualty remains to be the pawns, the Queen is to be protected and there is no civilians inside the chessboard. It's all black and white like the board itself.

Rewind back to Perang Badar. The battle are set in one location, far from the villages. You fight with sword in the day, you sleep at night. Lawan, lawan, lawan... capture the leader, break the battle flag, wins the war.
Casualty: Soldiers 20, Civilians 1

World War 1. Battle stationed near residency. Have peace time but no scheduled rest. Tanks, guns, bombs. Bam Bam Bam, cheat sheet - make Germany believe they lost. Alliance win war.
Casualty: Soldiers 20, Civilians 20

Israeli strikes upon Palestine (1948-present). Iraq war. Vietnam war. Korean War. Afghan War. World War II. Napalm strike. Bombs. Fighting jets. Missiles. Enemies are at South, forget the South, exterminate the residence in North. Smoke em out. Wins war.
Casualty: Soldier 1, Civilians more than 20.

And that, is called Civilianisation of War. In my book, it's called Cowardice. What happen to real manly man battle? Where your fist found your nemesis' chin and his right leg found your double O and 7 and both of you scream in pain and five days later one of you win, fair and square?

Humanity is now scarce.

Dialogue yang berlaku beberapa kurun yang lalu
Me: I'm so bored that I've been munching since morning
Mom: You're going to be fatter than ever
Me: Thanks for the undying support, mother

1. Do you think you are hot?
I'm not. Kita perempuan melayu intend to be hot and sexy lepas kawin je. Hahaha. (saya tak bertanggungjawab atas ayat di atas, saya pinjam dari Chaq). Or so like the saying goes (my saying pon, not 'the' saying) and I stand by it, "It's a house, so one to feel at home. It ain't a hotel, apatah lagi a motel. House have down payment, and bayar bulan-bulan, but it will always be there to welcome its owner." Hahahahaha... adeyh, aku tau ramainye yang tengah konpius.  

2. Upload your favourite picture of you.


3. Why do you like that picture?
Cuz... I like black and white. I like pics of me looking like I'm thinking. Or looking forlorn. Because that's what I am most of the time, being forlorn and thinking. And of course because I'm too lazy to browse through other pictures (alasan sebenar).

4. When was the last time you ate pizza?
Last month? I don't even like pizza. Been eating LOADS of that for the past year. Someone's birthday, pizza. Someone leaving the premise, pizza. Someone got promoted, pizz- neh, who ever got promoted...

5. The last song you listened to?
Entah. Apa lagu akhir dalam senarai iMesh aku? (check) "Don't Know Why".

6. What are you doing right now besides this?
Facebooking. Flixtering. Gmailing. Writing. Chatting. That's my daily schedule.

7. What name u prefer besides yours?
Abigail. No, I don't want to be called that. But I think it's a sweet name that people always relate to someone plain. I don't think Abigail is a plain name. I think an Abigail is someone who has more colours than her physical is showing. But then again, that's just my romantic notion of names.
Huh, panjangnya jawapan merepek aku ni.

8. People I tag:
1 Nad
2 Mun
3 Yeh

9. Who is no. 1?
My besfriend since high school. She's now pregnant with her first baby, and jual tudung ekin for living.

10. No. 3 is having relationship with?
No. 1. Haha.  (menjawab soalan fad di blognye, takde, takde. saya tak ada skandal dgn sesiapa di kala ini. Haha. Jika anda mengenali mana2 lelaki yang tak kisah dengan perempuan yg ada large scope of imagination and masuk tido pukul 9.30pagi dan bangun kul 3 petang, ask him to call me)

12. Who is no. 2?
My other bestfriend since high school. One of the most creative person I've ever known.

---

Tagged by Iza

1. Copy badge "2008 Cute's 3logger Award" di bawah untuk diletakkan di blog anda.

2. Link/ceritakan kembali siapa yang memberikan award ini kepada anda.
Iza adalah manusia. Dia sekarang sedang mengalami perubahan dalam diri, ingin cuba menjadi minah Aussie yang berlagak dengan kepanasan Malaysia tetapi tidak berjaya kerana setiap kali die cube berlagak pompous, dia akan ketawa. Aku rasa aku lagi pandai buat perangai arrrogant dari dia. Haha.

3. Setiap blogger mesti menyatakan 10 fakta/hobi diri sendiri sebelum memilih penerima award seterusnya.

a) aku suka fikir berlebihan. lepas tu peningkan kepala dengan apa yang aku fikir.
b) aku suka cipta teori dan analogi yang masih akan memeningkan kepala
c) aku suka berlagak macam orang tak ada masalah lepas tu pening kepala
d) aku suka membaca buku tak berhenti-henti sampai kepala pening
e) kadang-kadang aku suka jugak peningkan kepala aku dengan masalah orang lain padahal orang lain tu tak piker pun masalah dia.
f) selepas berbincang dengan Nad, aku kini hanya amik pedulik pada orang yang amik pedulik pada aku. Orang tak amik pedulik kita persetankan. Loyalty is now a two way street. Haha.
g) aku suka menulis apa yang aku suka tulis. Pastu orang yang suka kutuk tulisan aku biasanya akan selalu datang melawat blog aku balik. Tak suka blah la kan? Hatred memang sangat magnetic.
h) I'm a defeatist, hypocrite, memandai, with victim mentality, oblivious to surrounding, irrational, subversive, or so someone once told me. 
i) aku tak paham betul orang nak terjun bangunan bila putus cinta. Kalau laki tu tinggalkan ko, tolak DIA la terjun bangunan, yg ko yg terjun buat apa. Homicide, babe. Not suicide. Sile chant itu. Akakaka.
j) aku suka cuaca sekarang. Sebab tu lagi seronok berjaga malam and bau aroma hujan.

4. Anda perlu memilih 10 (tapi saya pun nak tuka jadi 5 je hahah) penerima award seterusnya dan menyatakan nama mereka di blog anda.
masni - walaupon aku tau minah ni jarang nak buat tag
mun - supaya dia apdet blog
nad - supaya die berenti makan roti jap
ema - sebab kita mesti tag ema
jis - supaya die berenti depressed seketika. hahaha

5. Jangan lupa untuk melawat blog mereka dan meninggalkan komen yang menyatakan
"anda telah di tag - sila layari blog saya untuk mendapatkan award anda".
MALASSSS....

As I was eating popcorn while watching "Ong Bak 2" and thinking the ways to review this movie and smiling alone because Tony Jaa would not love my review, I stared at the popcorn box with Jack Neo's film on it and then glance at the Press Kit our dearest Azizee gave (saje je guna ayat mengampu) on that 'The Wedding Game' PC and screening and realised that it has been a while since I watch a good Hong Kong film.

And I don't mean artsy Hong Kong stuff. And I am not talking about John Woo or Ang Lee or Wong Kar Wai stuff. I am talking about the 90s feel good movies. I mean, nowadays with the emergence of highly annoying heroins like Gillian Cheung, Charlene Choi and Miriam Yeung, and "I'm-so-cool-cuz-I'm-ABC" types like Daniel Wu, Stephen Fung and Edison Chen, it made me kinda miss the old group.

I like Anita Yuen, or Charlie Yeung. They don't have that whiny cutesy voices and they're still fun to watch. Sandra Ng, Dodo and Teresa Mo cracks me up all the time. You can have the nerdy geeky guys playing heroes like Raymond Wong and you still watch it. And no matter how crude Wong Jing can be, you still watch his movies. And your mum lets you, even when the scene is about an ice cream cone stuck in some busty babe's bikini.

And of course, TVB costume dramas. I know we're in the hallyu phenomenon, where guys like Kwon Sang-woo and pretty girls like Jyun Ji-hyun graces the 29" screen, and we were once all crazy with the Takeshis and Yutakas of the tv world, and once stuck in those horrible horrible era of Taiwanese tv dramas and have Jerry Yen on every single channel ( I am so sorry, but I cannot stand Angela Hwang... her acting AND singing simultaneously), but nothing beats a TVB drama.

Korean tv series has that looong dragging episodic kind of thing, you know, especially when it comes to the tragic part and the 'I love him' 'he loves her' 'she loves him too but she's married' triangle. Even when you missed an episode (or two... or three) you may come back and realise that it's not really going anywhere. The Kim is still sad about her fate in love, the Jang is still mourning over the loss of Mina and Mina still termenung kat tepi tingkap watching the snow while the theme song that will later have a Malaysian remake is playing at the background.

So is the Taiwanese tv drama, that mostly has s synopsis about an 'ugly' (but cutesy, because Taiwanese actress must all be cutesy and wears long stockings and striking yellow mini skirt) girl who meets a stern no nonsense metrosexual rich guy or stern no nonsense gangster guy and they fell in love. Throw a bit of a plot about long lost love or girl's father in huge debt and etc, voila, you have yourself a Taiwanese tv drama.

And then there's the Japanese tv drama that mostly is about:
a) the life of a pilot and the people he met in the plane
b) the life of a restaurateur and the people she met in the restaurant
c) the life of hoteliers and the people they met in the hotel
That's how it goes usually.

But TVB dramas. They're different. They're fast. And if you missed one episode, prepare yourself to be highly confused. I made the wrong decision to leave one episode of "The Duke of Mount Deer" once upon a time and realise the next day Wai Siu Po has already three wives and going on for the fourth. The cast arre not all good looking people. But they're good at storytelling. I mean, I love "Riches and Stitches", "Seven Sisters", "Colourful Life"... I love watching Annie Man, Jessica Au Yeung, Bobby Au Yeong, Frankie Lam... I got it from mum. She used to love Alex Man and Nancy Chow.... like "The Key Man" and that old TVB drama about Nancy returning to her past... whassit called... eyh tak ingat. 

And yeah, I love some ATV stuff too, like "Smart Kid", or "Fong Sai Yuk"... particularly Dicky Cheung stuff, that is until that horrible fake snake in "Tai Chi Master" that I stop watching ATV stuff.        

I am babbling am I? Sorry, I'm just updating the blog as an excuse to not write "Ong Bak 2" review. Huhu

Sunset - air laut yang panas - kuis kerang bentuk kacang. Any meaning at all? Hmm... I want to draw that picture so badly, I curse myself for playing around during kelas pendidikan seni.

18 January 2008... I mean 9.

Tepat sebulan I left CO. It's just a month? Wow, time does go slowly when you're at home. I still hutang the office, and the office still hutang me. That's how the relationship goes, anyway. There is always that sense of hanging by a thread due to a certain debt. (And aku hutang kak Ani resipi caramel, she must now be pissed off with me for keep promising to give it to her and yet forgot). Well, I don't actually forgot, it's just the last time I came to the office she weren't there and I promised to bring her the ACTUAL caramel pudding anyway. Actual caramel pudding tak bleh hantar pakai email. Bukan salah saya, bukan? Huhu. I hutang lots of stuff with Kak Ani.

I barely talk about Kak Ani in my blog and I think it's unfair. I mean, she's been such a dear, and sort of a big sister to me throughout the one year I was working there. She has the patience that I have not found in anybody (especially myself). I mean, putting up with two bosses with two different views - sometimes with clashing opinion, and then to put up with other people's bosses too, the staffs complaints especially regarding allowances and claims, and then to get shouted on the phone by people because they think she's the receptionist (because it's a typical dumb Malaysians habit to think that receptionists are dumb), and then has to deal with craps like food in the pantry, inventories, toilet problems, pipes issues, order makanan... when I worked under her before I even told her once,

"Kak Ani, saya tak tau macam mana Kak Ani deal hari-hari dengan benda semua ni, sebab kadang-kadang saya rasa kemarahan saya dah sampai takat hidung." and she would smile and say, "Lama-lama nanti biase dah. Pekakkan jelah telinga."

Yup. I learn how to multitask from her too. I never seen anybody balancing accounts while talking to a plumber, and taking messages from the boss all at the same time. Let me tell you, Kak Ani is a pro at that. And while I was working in three departments at one go (ah good times, good times... akaka), I sort of try to channel that too. You remember that one time that I had to translate a news on ABP, pick winners and deal with the subscription problem simultaneously? Yeah, that was so not fun, let's not ever do that again. Haha.


Congratulations to Maria, though. Pretending to not know anything for 9 hours was reaaaallly painful for me, you know. Hahaha. 

I am waiting for the new layout for my blog, which will be done by our html expert Cik Masniazian who sometimes terganggu dengan anasir-anasir jahat (ha). I told her that if my new layout are postponed because of that anasir-anasir jahat, I will personally go and kill her, not Masni, the anasir I mean.

Apa lagi? Oh yeah, my sister still has a grudge against Datuk Siti's watch. She now announced that Siti Nurhaliza has no right to talk about penderitaan mangsa-mangsa kekejaman Gaza. You know, this Richard Mille watch thing... I can sooo make lots of sarcastic one-liners about it, that I don't know which one to choose so I'd rather leave the topic altogether. Usually I'll ask people to pick, like the "Life starts at tits" slogan (err... long story).

I was watching "Doraemon" with my brothers, and like always, we find another way to watch Doraemon that is more fun. For example, by guessing what kind of tools that Doraemon is going to bring out from his pocket. Yesterday's episode was about Sizuka having problem. She has eaten the one red candy that her mum kept as it is the winning candy that can be exchanged with two tickets to Switzerland. What would Doraemon do to help her?

Aying: "Mesin muntah semula!"
Syahida: "Mesin gergaji perut tanpa rasa sakit!"
Aying: "Mesin berak tanpa merosakkan rupa asal gula-gula itu!"

WRONG! Doraemon keluarkan 'Submarine!' yang boleh masuk ke dalam perut Sizuka dan ambil gula-gula itu. Come to think of it, that's pretty gross. I mean, I'd rather mesin gergaji perut.

The next episode, we played the guess what happens next. Like, I guess that Nobita would not get to ride in Suneo brother's car (BINGO!), in which he came home sad and wanted to read his comics, and Aying guessed that his comic books are all sold to the old newspaper guy (BINGO!), in which I guessed that it's because his mum was angry that he failed his exam (BINGO!). Then we laugh macam nak gila. Try it. It's fun. But then one have to try play that guessing game with my brother, I don't think playing it with other people will have the same effect.
See, fifteen years leaving Doraemon still did not falter our knowledge about him. Hahahahahaha. 

"Maala pherat jug bhaya,
mita na man ka pher,
kar ka manka chhodke,
manka manka pher..."

                         "You have been counting rosary beads for an era,
                           but the wandering of your mind does not halt,
                           forsake the beads in your hand,
                           and start moving the beads of your heart..."
                                                                                                          -Kabir-

"Slumdog Millionaire" just won a Golden Globe, and after reading the book (originally published as "Q&A"), written by Vikas Swarup, I now understand why. And of course, I haven't watch the movie, because cinema blum main (and buat2 macam innocent tak pernah melawat pirates).

Really, someone really famous (and therefore any words he said is considered quote-worthy) once said, that a good book is a book in which you will miss after read, like a part of yourself just lost when you finished reading it. Well, of course the famous guy (whose name I still can't remember) didn't say it like that, and I've paraphrased, but something like that lah. And true, I missed the book now I have finished it. It's like the first time I read "Pride & Prejudice", and "Animal Farm". But this time, it's more poignant, straightforward, funny and has that fairy tale quality to it, but not in a cliche way.

Don't just watch the movie. Read the book. Read the book. Dengar cakap kak Shai ni...


Some of my favourite lines in the book:

"We were always told never to pick a quarrel with a police. Street boys like me come at the bottom of the food chain. Above us are the petty criminals, like pickpockets. Above them come the extortionists and loan sharks. Above them the dons. Above them then come the big business houses. But above all of them are the police. They have the instrument of naked power. Nobody polices the police."

"Why didn't you just leave me?" he asks.
"Because I'm your guardian angel. And I'm a part of your package."

"When you have been plucked from a beautiful bungalow... and dumped in a crumbling house... I suppose you do acquire a somewhat jaundiced view of life."

"Dharavi is not a place for the squeamish. Delhi's juvenile home diminished us, but Dharavi's grim landscape of urban squalor deadens and debases us."

"He abuses no one in particular and yet everyone. He abuses the rich, who live in their palatial homes and do not care for the poor who serve them. He abuses the fat-cat doctor, who fleece their patients. He abuses the government, which makes promises only on paper. He abuses all of us for being mute spectators..... He holds his dead son in his arms and wails till his tears run dry, till his voice fails."

"Love doesn't happen in an instant. It creeps up on you and then it turns your life upside down. It colors your waking moments and fills your dreams. You begin to walk on air and see life in brilliant new shades. But it also brings with it a sweet agony, a delicious torture. My life was reduced to feverish meetings with Nita and pining for her in between."

"And i wonder what it feels like to have no desires left because you have satisfied them all, smothered them with money even before they are born. Is an existence without desire very desirable? And is poverty of desire is a rank of poverty itself?"

Overall, if 'Slumdog Millionaire' is a guy, I would have married it.
------

In another note:

1. The paper tried to say that Datuk Siti's new RM250K watch is not much compared to loads of other gifts to celebs like Juliana Banos' RM1mil Ferrari. But here's a thought. Have you ever seen a RM10 car? I mean, that actually you can ride? Have you seen one worth RM100? Or RM1000? No right?
Have you seen watches with that amount of value? Yes right?
You can never buy a car of RM50. But you can buy a watch with that amount. So it's personal, it's Datuk Siti's business, it's her husband's money. But then again, it makes you shake your head, how easy money flies in the world of the wealthy. How many better things you can do with that amount rather than a watch. How many Palestinians you may be able to save rather than telling time that is smouldered with diamonds.

2. I have issues when celebrities who performed in charity shows say stuff like, "Yeah, I believe in this charity and that all artists should also participate in such event." Okay, what Jinbara did or Search did last time was considered charity - when they performed for free. IF you are paid to sing in a charity event, you are NOT a part of that charity. Do it for free or for less money. And then you can gloat.

3. "What kind of a moron who knows that she is 17, and therefore has a chance to be selected for National Service, and yet signed a contract? Logically, she cannot even use that excuse to flip NS right now." says kaklong, who still grudge against Diana Danielle.

Recuperating. Thanks Nad. Thanks for listening. Thanks for not judging, Thanks for not saying that I'm stupid. Hahaha. Walaupon aku tak terjadikan ko sasterawati negara, tapi best kan, tau yang aku bermasalah, sebab aku asik berlagak yg aku takde masalah?

Ngaaaaahahahahaha....... sigh. adeyh.

1. What should a woman do when she lost a bit of weight? I have a perfectly good answer for that. Be happy for a while and do nothin. Come to think of it, worrying that you're fat makes you fatter, and trying too hard to be thin will also makes you fatter. At least inside your head. It's just enough to have the most straightforward person tell you if you are or not. That's it.

2. Wonder why g-strings are called g-strings... what does that 'G' stands for anyway? Come to think of it, if you look carefully, they should've called it 'T'-string.

3. Jis, Masni and I lepak kat Dataran Shah Alam yesterday, and saw some kids playing with fire. I mean, their parents must be proud... it's whether their kids gonna grow up and become a firefighter.... or arsonists

4. Do you know what I hate other than perverts?
Perverts that have bad grammar.
Like this one guy in flixter (yeah, some people on flixter are really creepy weirdos) who send me a creepy message that goes;
"Can I lick your pussy, my friend?"
........... seriously dude, nobody talked dirty to a stranger and calling them 'friend'. Don't you even know the 'rule of rudeness'?
Pervert wannabes....

5. I never realised how many Pringles (sour cream and onion flavour) that the family consumed per month, until dad arranged all the cylinder tube thingy on the floor next to the store room, and it resembles a city filled with skyscrapers. Wow, we really ARE Pringles-obsessed.

6. Once upon a time, on dad's birthday, I bought him a keychain that has his name on it with what kind of character he has at the back (it's easy to find, as 'Kamarudin' is a common malay name). So just now, I read it again;
"KAMARUDIN - Bererti Bulan Agama. Ketenangan jiwa sentiasa tergambar pada wajahnya. Berkeperibadian tinggi, berhati-hati dan sentiasa memelihara tingkah laku dan tutur kata. Banyak berahsia dan sukar dimengertikan."
Yup, that's dad alright. The keychain maker must be a real genius!

7. Upon chatting with my colleague about my dad's Indonesian movies collection, I realised that not even once I watched any of it (except for 'Mak Lampir'). So yesterday I decided to watch 'Tangkuban Perahu'.
Boy. That Marissa Haque lady sure look and sound like Fasha Sandha. And hell she cannot act to save her life. If I had to hear her scream 'Kakang!' halfheartedly again, Imma kill myself.

8. On Saturday, it was the third time the neighbourhood got another sembur nyamuk activity done by MBSA again, making the street filled with fog-like oddly smelling spray. And this time, all my siblings are at home (it was Monday and Thursday before this), so like any other activity, the Kamarudin's family has our own way of responding towards the thing.
Kaklong: "Ah, jangan! Kita dalam "The Mist"! "The Mist"! Nanti nyamuk aedes makin besar!"
Aying: (sambil cuba memukul jerebu yang masuk ke rumah whilst screaming) "Take that! And that! And that!" 
Moi: "Ah, manusia dalam kemusnahan, kita harus cari human sacrifice! Bunuh! Bunuh!" (pretending to be Mrs. Carmody)
Then dad went outside into the smoke
"Ayah! Masuk! Masuk! Nanti kena serang dengan serangga raksasa!!!!"
(But all this joke would mean nothing if you never read nor watched Stephen King's 'THE MIST')

9. "Masa kat Indonesia dulu, dekat rumah member, ayah pergi makan. Ambik la satu lauk kari ni, lepas tu tiba-tiba ada sorang cina indonesia ni bagitau, "You tak boleh makan tu Din. Tu kari daging babi."
5 minutes later
"Ada satu buah ceri tu, orang panggil buah cenerai. Mula-mula warna hijau, lepas tu tukar jadi warna merah, bila masak dia jadi warna hitam dan jatuh ke tanah. Yang hitam tu sedap dimakan. Tapi kalau silap kutip, terkutip dan makan taik kambing, sebab rupa dia sama."
"Ayah ni. Daging babi, taik kambing, benda apa ajelah yang masuk dalam perut."

10. Upon watching ANOTHER of Mawekin wedding on TV dad said,
"Mawi ni nak bersanding sepanjang tahun ke?"
and then started on an argument with mum regarding Mawi's wedding. I'm not being biased here. But of course aku sokong ayah. Ha.
"Mawi macam si Tanggang," says dad. "Dia pergi KL, nampak pompuan lawa, terus lupa tunang lama." Even mum had to laugh at that.

11. I cut my hair finally. 'Twas difficult at first, cuz when you had your hair all shiny and dark and pretty due to the tricky lighting at the salon, you almost wanna get up and go home. But nope. Snip snip, and gone all those locks that has been bugging my head.
I almost wanted to tell the girl to just stop trying to make it into a bob. I mean, what's the use? I am so gonna destroy the style in a matter of two days anyway.
And returning home and have my mum went, "You look like me in that picture when I was 18, with makdik."
And I look into the mirror and go, "My God, I DO look like mum."  
Mun, Tim, Nad... upon seeing me again with my new haircut I demand you guys to agree that it's cute, even if it's not! This is an order, since I'm so loyal and being a good friend all this years and all... hahahahahahaha

At 2.35am, I was sitting on the sejadah, and felt that my cheeks are wet.

And I know i'm in trouble.